I can't believe it has taken me this long, but I've finally realized what is so stressful about the holidays. It isn't the crowds or the frenzy. It isn't trying to find the perfect gift. Forget the cocktail hours and get-togethers. Finding hostess gifts and baking cookies is nothing. Picking just the right tree and getting it into the stand at 90 degrees is nothing. The true stress of the season is the celebratory scheduling.
Figuring out where the Teacher and I were spending Thanksgiving was a simple fete. We are going to do dinner with his family, then off to my sister's for pie.
When it came time to start figuring out Christmas I expected the same ease. Alas, I was sadly mistaken. It took us months to finalize our plans and it included a lot of juggling, compromise and stress. But in the end it all worked out.
Christmas Eve day we started at his parents house and then exactly an hour at his uncle's house before we hit the road for 45 minutes to get to my parent's house to greet my sister's family for the first round of present opening.
The next morning we stopped back to my parent's house to be fed a hearty Christmas Morning breakfast then back up the road to The Teacher's parent's house again for Presents Version 2.0.
It ended up to be a lot of running around, but it allowed us to see all of our family and enjoy time with them all, which as an agnostic, isn't that really the point. And since there was plenty of red wine flowing at all locations, I had plenty of the "Christmas Spirit."
Bookmarkz
Showing newest posts with label christmas. Show older posts
Showing newest posts with label christmas. Show older posts
Happy Holidays!
Wednesday, December 24, 2008
Well here we are boys and girls, it is officially Christmas. At least it is for those of us who grew up 100% German (all four of my grandparents were off the boat German) and get to celebrate Christmas on Christmas Eve.
As the presents are all wrapped and Olivia is guarding them (they are all in that bag, I promise,)
and the holiday greetings have been sent,
I’d like to share a short story about a bit of Grinch-dom:
One of my co-workers is a total tool. He is often grouchy and obnoxious and while in his 30’s continues to use the word “titties” at least twice a day. While I do attempt to avoid all social contact with him, I am still a fair co-worker so I picked up a $15 Starbucks gift card for him as that is what I was getting everyone else.
Douche Bag: "Can I give this back to you as your present?"
Dutchess of Kickball: "um..no"
DB: "Thanks, but I really don't drink Starbucks"
DoK: "..."
DB: "So you can just have it back"
DoK: "um...no"
DB: "ok, I'll just regift it to someone else"
Dok: "You’re an asshole, don't look a gift horse in the mouth"
DB: "I'm not into horses, remember?"
DoK: "You don't have to be into horses, you've never heard that saying?"
DB: "no, I'm not into horses"
DoK: "It has nothing to do with horses, jeesus, you’re just an asshole, it's...oh, nevermind..."
DB: "ok, I'll just regift it"
DoK: “…”
And so, on this Christmas Eve, I wish you have a lovely, idiot-free holiday, and even if you don't like your gifts, you grin and bear like a real adult!
Bookmarkz
As the presents are all wrapped and Olivia is guarding them (they are all in that bag, I promise,)
and the holiday greetings have been sent,
I’d like to share a short story about a bit of Grinch-dom:
One of my co-workers is a total tool. He is often grouchy and obnoxious and while in his 30’s continues to use the word “titties” at least twice a day. While I do attempt to avoid all social contact with him, I am still a fair co-worker so I picked up a $15 Starbucks gift card for him as that is what I was getting everyone else.
Douche Bag: "Can I give this back to you as your present?"
Dutchess of Kickball: "um..no"
DB: "Thanks, but I really don't drink Starbucks"
DoK: "..."
DB: "So you can just have it back"
DoK: "um...no"
DB: "ok, I'll just regift it to someone else"
Dok: "You’re an asshole, don't look a gift horse in the mouth"
DB: "I'm not into horses, remember?"
DoK: "You don't have to be into horses, you've never heard that saying?"
DB: "no, I'm not into horses"
DoK: "It has nothing to do with horses, jeesus, you’re just an asshole, it's...oh, nevermind..."
DB: "ok, I'll just regift it"
DoK: “…”
And so, on this Christmas Eve, I wish you have a lovely, idiot-free holiday, and even if you don't like your gifts, you grin and bear like a real adult!
Bookmarkz
The Christmas Bonus
Thursday, December 11, 2008
Last night I sat down and drank my Christmas bonus. No no, I'm not that much of a lush, I didn't cash a check and go straight to the liquor store (not that I wouldn't, but this time I didn't.) My Christmas bonus was actually a bottle of wine. In the industry I work in, it's appropriate. I sipped at the bottle of white and I thought of an old story about Christmas bonuses.
Three Christmases ago, my first, at my previous job I had kicked some serious ass and single handedly increased sales by 300% as Director of E-Commerce and Marketing. And yes, I'm not being a douchy boss by not giving credit where credit is due, I had no employees. I ran the entire website and all store marketing BY MYSELF. (I'll pat my self on the back, thank you very much) So, because I kicked so much ass and revitalized the website from one step above Geocities to some modern day biznatch, I was awarded with not one, but a two paycheck bonus.
Ca-ching!
The next Christmas rolled around and I was equally as successful and I continued to be amazing. December days ticked by. As it was getting dangerously close to the holiday, and no bonus checks had been distributed I cornered the part-time accountant to see if she had been asked to cut checks. No luck.
On the last possible day, my bosses handed all the managers a box at a meeting. I figured there was something nice in the box, maybe a scarf, or leather gloves, with a check on top.
I waited until the meeting was over and back in my office to open the box. I think I immediately started to cry. Instead of a nice, fat check staring back at me I found brownies.They might have been designer, luxury, gourmet insanely fudgy and pepperminty brownies, but unless there was an ingot of gold baked into them, no brownies are worth a double paycheck bonus. Alas, I didn't break my tooth.
By the next Christmas my bosses had sold the company and I got the official "peace out." I suppose that is the only thing worse than the brownies.
Bookmarkz
Three Christmases ago, my first, at my previous job I had kicked some serious ass and single handedly increased sales by 300% as Director of E-Commerce and Marketing. And yes, I'm not being a douchy boss by not giving credit where credit is due, I had no employees. I ran the entire website and all store marketing BY MYSELF. (I'll pat my self on the back, thank you very much) So, because I kicked so much ass and revitalized the website from one step above Geocities to some modern day biznatch, I was awarded with not one, but a two paycheck bonus.
Ca-ching!
The next Christmas rolled around and I was equally as successful and I continued to be amazing. December days ticked by. As it was getting dangerously close to the holiday, and no bonus checks had been distributed I cornered the part-time accountant to see if she had been asked to cut checks. No luck.
On the last possible day, my bosses handed all the managers a box at a meeting. I figured there was something nice in the box, maybe a scarf, or leather gloves, with a check on top.
I waited until the meeting was over and back in my office to open the box. I think I immediately started to cry. Instead of a nice, fat check staring back at me I found brownies.They might have been designer, luxury, gourmet insanely fudgy and pepperminty brownies, but unless there was an ingot of gold baked into them, no brownies are worth a double paycheck bonus. Alas, I didn't break my tooth.
By the next Christmas my bosses had sold the company and I got the official "peace out." I suppose that is the only thing worse than the brownies.
Bookmarkz
Checking My List Twice
Wednesday, October 22, 2008
Warning: If you are anyone that I purchase Christmas presents for please stop reading now or your surprise will be ruined. That means you, Noelle, Flick, Brother-in-Law, Teacher, etc.
Long story, I’ll get to it another time, but it is now time for me to officially begin and end my Christmas shopping. I cracked out the spreadsheet to keep it all in line since keeping track of all these gifts and stocking stuffers can boggle my mind.
I also strive to give original and unusual gifts that the giftee wouldn’t typically purchase for themselves. It makes for a challenge. I’ve been doing some etsy and delight.com browsing for the last month or so and I think I have a pretty good idea of what everyone is getting:
Mom and Dad:
Typically, I never ever know what to get them for Christmas. They have this big thing about hating clutter and never wanting “stuff.” But…the good graces of my sister making funny faces in the last family photo we did made this year’s present perfect, a new family portrait! As the kids are a year and a half older now (which is a big deal with you are only five at the most) and the addition of The Teacher into the mix, makes the perfect gift.
Not sure what I’m going to do for stocking stuffers for my dad yet, but I do want to get my mother this beautiful bird’s nest necklace for her stocking stuffer.
My sister:
She will be receiving a copy of the book Cake Art, something she enjoys dabbling in.
And I’ll probably pick up a pair of cute earrings from etsy or something else generic because I'm being lame and can't come up with something super cool.
My Brother-in-Law:
Somehow this guy is super easy to shop for and I’m always finding fun things all year long. I picked up a Bubble Calendar for him during the year.
And I might find something else cute or geeky to add onto that. Maybe something with a 1Up mushroom, that would be fun!
My 5 year old niece:
My 3 year old niece:
I have no idea yet, but since I just made her that puppet theater for her birthday more than likely she is going to be getting some kind of fun puppet.
My 2 year old nephew:
And all three kids are going to get these super fun finger puppets. I do think the Karma Voodoo Doll puppet is neat, but I’ll have a hard enough time explaining to the kids what a Yeti is, forget both karma and voodoo.
The Teacher:
I have just about ten bajillion things I could get for him. While he might want a table saw or kickball cleats, I could get him a anything from Pug prints to a dart set to a Cuisinart. But I think I’m going to go with a Tom Tom GPS since he can’t find his way to the bathroom.
As for a stocking stuffer, I had bought him this really cool octopus tie, but ended up giving it to him before Coach’s wedding, so I’ll have to figure out a replacement.
Flick and Tucker:
Any new homeowners need nothing but cash. But since I’m against just giving cash I’ll do the next best thing. Lowes gift cards (I’m personally partial to Lowes over Home Depot, I don’t know why)
Coach and Her New Husband:
These two will be super easy because I’m just going to purchase off their registry. What they didn’t get for the wedding they will be getting for Christmas instead.
Noelle:
I found these cute/ retro plaques that spell “read” at signals.com. I think she will love them, since, you know, she reads and all.
KT:
KT is never seen in public without a huge purse, I think she'll love this one, it looks soft and luxorious.
The Teacher’s Brother:
Zombie Pin Up Girls. What else would you buy for a single, 26 year old, taking a year off before going to law school?
Bookmarkz
Long story, I’ll get to it another time, but it is now time for me to officially begin and end my Christmas shopping. I cracked out the spreadsheet to keep it all in line since keeping track of all these gifts and stocking stuffers can boggle my mind.
I also strive to give original and unusual gifts that the giftee wouldn’t typically purchase for themselves. It makes for a challenge. I’ve been doing some etsy and delight.com browsing for the last month or so and I think I have a pretty good idea of what everyone is getting:
Mom and Dad:
Typically, I never ever know what to get them for Christmas. They have this big thing about hating clutter and never wanting “stuff.” But…the good graces of my sister making funny faces in the last family photo we did made this year’s present perfect, a new family portrait! As the kids are a year and a half older now (which is a big deal with you are only five at the most) and the addition of The Teacher into the mix, makes the perfect gift.
Not sure what I’m going to do for stocking stuffers for my dad yet, but I do want to get my mother this beautiful bird’s nest necklace for her stocking stuffer.
My sister:
She will be receiving a copy of the book Cake Art, something she enjoys dabbling in.
And I’ll probably pick up a pair of cute earrings from etsy or something else generic because I'm being lame and can't come up with something super cool.
My Brother-in-Law:
Somehow this guy is super easy to shop for and I’m always finding fun things all year long. I picked up a Bubble Calendar for him during the year.
And I might find something else cute or geeky to add onto that. Maybe something with a 1Up mushroom, that would be fun!
My 5 year old niece:
Is it wrong that I want to play this with her?
My 3 year old niece:
I have no idea yet, but since I just made her that puppet theater for her birthday more than likely she is going to be getting some kind of fun puppet.
My 2 year old nephew:
And all three kids are going to get these super fun finger puppets. I do think the Karma Voodoo Doll puppet is neat, but I’ll have a hard enough time explaining to the kids what a Yeti is, forget both karma and voodoo.
The Teacher:
I have just about ten bajillion things I could get for him. While he might want a table saw or kickball cleats, I could get him a anything from Pug prints to a dart set to a Cuisinart. But I think I’m going to go with a Tom Tom GPS since he can’t find his way to the bathroom.
As for a stocking stuffer, I had bought him this really cool octopus tie, but ended up giving it to him before Coach’s wedding, so I’ll have to figure out a replacement.
Flick and Tucker:
Any new homeowners need nothing but cash. But since I’m against just giving cash I’ll do the next best thing. Lowes gift cards (I’m personally partial to Lowes over Home Depot, I don’t know why)
Coach and Her New Husband:
These two will be super easy because I’m just going to purchase off their registry. What they didn’t get for the wedding they will be getting for Christmas instead.
Noelle:
I found these cute/ retro plaques that spell “read” at signals.com. I think she will love them, since, you know, she reads and all.
KT:
KT is never seen in public without a huge purse, I think she'll love this one, it looks soft and luxorious.
The Teacher’s Brother:
Zombie Pin Up Girls. What else would you buy for a single, 26 year old, taking a year off before going to law school?
Do you have any hard to shop for people in your lives?
Bookmarkz
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